Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Not Logical...

When I was shopping the other day I ran across a bunch of different notepads. My heart skipped a beat...they were adorable...and for a list lover, they were nearly perfect. I flipped through to find just the right one, which took about half a second.

PRO/CON List it read at the top. Which in my head means, "How to make a logical/rational/responsible decision." Man I love a pro/con list, and the idea of being able to buy a little notepad that already had those two words so cutely typed on it made me giddy! (seriously, that's how easy it is)

There is a pro/con list running through my head pretty much all the time. The advantages/disadvantages of everything I encounter. From the itty bitty decisions to the life altering.

As I reached to pick of one two of those little tablets that I was SURE were created JUST for me I heard a faint whisper in my head.



It went something like this: Seriously?!? You have me, The God of the Universe, who knows every second of your life, from before you were born until the day you take your last breath...and then some, and yet you resort to the pro/con list?!? That's really the best you can do?



Oh the Holy Spirit...He gets me every time...speaking truth, straight to my heart, in a language I understand. Reminding me that my humanness...it slays me. Big time.



I put that cute little notepad down...and walked away.



Just last night I had a situation come up that caught me off guard. I immediately began the list...and then stopped. It didn't matter what the list said. It didn't matter that logically the cons outnumbered the pros, I knew in my heart what my decision should be. It should be yes even though the list says no.



God's power and plans shatter my lists...always. My humanness craves logic and reason...tangible evidence. But my heart...it longs for faith. The kind of faith that steps out of the boat, and onto the crashing waves simply because Jesus said to. It doesn't have to make sense to me. In fact, most of the time it makes NO sense to me...because my mind limits Him time and time again.



Today I'm praying for a bigger vision. Bigger expectations for what God is doing...because He's doing them whether I see it or not...and I don't wanna miss it by being an idiot ;)



...also praying He helps me to miraculously stop making those dumb lists in my head...seriously, A MIRACLE!





*on a completely unrelated note: The Twilight series I've been reading has really got me thinking about Heaven...so more on that tomorrow. I know, I know you're wondering how a book about vampires has me thinking about Heaven and so I must remind you that I am in fact a pastor's wife, which gives me the ability to make ANYTHING into a spiritual lesson...it's a gift, what can I say? ;)

20 comments:

  1. I'm not much of a list maker (I always seem to lose them when I need them the most), but still...cute notepads do something to me I don't understand.

    So I getcha, sister!

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  2. Wow - thank you for this.

    If you are the queen of pro/con lists then I'm the princess or at least the duchess.

    I needed this reminder.

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  3. Sarah,
    sometimes your straightforward/insightful sharing just bowls me over. :)You'll write about some thing that you are learning and I'll think, "Wow, that is so true - why haven't I thought of it that way?" It's very cool and I really appreciate you. :)

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  4. From one list-maker to another. Thankyou. I needed that.

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  5. this is exactly why i like the blogging world so much - people i don't even know write about something that i needed so much to read.
    thank you very much for posting this!

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  6. Making spiritual application to ordinary things is a gift that comes in especially handy as a pastor's wife. Isn't it kind of funny that God always asks us to do things that make so little human sense? I feel that so many times, my decisions must seem ridiculous to those looking from the outside.

    So how do you like the Twilight series. I just finished book 2 and I must say that I'm slighly dissapointed. (I need spell check!) I just hear SO many GREAT things that I guess I expected these books to be better than anything I've ever read. I mean they're good, but I expected GREAT. What do you think?

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  7. I can so relate with this post, my friend. It reminds me of my favorite part of an old Susan Ashton song...

    "you want to hold the intangible,
    to fashion the darkness into familiar shape, to see with your eyes, to know in your mind...
    Oh ye of so little faith.
    Only the heart, can hold the intangible."

    Thanks for sharing this today.

    Blessings,
    Tracy

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  8. Sarah, you are so right - and it seems most of the time that's how it goes. The list says no but the answer is still yes. Those lists can really be a hindrance, huh? Stretch showed me a quote in his devotions this morning that said
    this:

    If you think about yourself, you hinder your usefulness to God.

    Those lists usually come down to thinking about ourselves, right? And I don't know anyone who would consciously, voluntarily hinder their usefulness to God.

    Good post. :)

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  9. I love the truth of this post!!! I am a list maker, too.

    I am reading your posts, but seldome comment on anyone's anymore. :) But I'm here - and I heart your posts.

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  10. I am also a fan of lists. I tend to forget a lot of stuff and I need to write them down. Thanks for reminding me that there is someone who knows best. What a way to start my day. Thanks.

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  11. Wow...you spoke to me today. Yes, I'm a list maker...pros/cons...but even worse. I'm a score keeper. Well I was nice this once...so you owe me. NOT GOOD I know...but admitting I have a problem is the first step to recovery right?

    And on your Twilight note...I can't wait to hear your message. Pretty much these days you could read me the phone book and as long as you mentioned Edward/Bella/Alice/etc...every now and then I'd be hooked.

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  12. I can't wait to hear your thoughts on Twilight. I took my daughters to see the movie last week and they loved it. Surprisingly (at least to me) I liked it too. Now I have to read the books. My oldest daughter has them and I told her not to loan it out again because I want to read it as soon as I finish the book I'm reading right now.

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  13. ARGHHH! The voices! "The Voice of Truth" by Casting Crowns, convicts and encourages me EVERY time I hear it!

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  14. i never make a list- on paper. just compulsively make a decision or roll it around in my head until i go bananas. it's listening to God and recognizing His prompting vs me.... hum. good stuff Sarah.

    and i went to see twilight with two 14 year olds..!.. but now it's waiting til the next one comes out!!

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  15. Girl. I just love you.

    I'm right there with you. Thanks for your openness.

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  16. Thank you so much! I'm a chronic list-keeper and pro/con decision-maker. I struggle with the balance of making wise decisions with my head and hearing God's direction...not to mention worrying about what people think of my decisions. I'm glad He promises to finish the good work He started in me, because I have a long way to go. :-)

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  17. Interesting perspective. I wouldn't have thought of it that way.

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  18. Yep. I'm amazed at how often we share the same lessons at the same time (see my blog from December 1).

    Thanks for keepin' it real. ;-)
    -J

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  19. I have been thinking about this post for days. Just a simple notepad, and a profound message. Good stuff.

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