The Book List:
There are a million good books on marriage out there. We've read quite a few really good ones. This list is just what I have read and loved. They are the ones I most often recommend. If you've read any that you have found helpful, then leave a comment and let everyone know!
Hedges by Jerry B. Jenkins - Super good. Every marriage needs to have boundaries to protect it. Practical advice & it's short (if that helps:)
Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas - Digs deep into God's purpose for marriage. It will hurt your feelings and tell you to get over yourself because it's not about you. And if you'll let God root that deep in your heart, your marriage will be transformed.
Love & Respect - by Dr. Emmerson Eggerichs - He breaks down the idea that women need/want love from their husbands, and husbands want/need respect from their wives. Sounds simple...but we tend to give what we want to receive. If a husband does not feel respected by his wife, it's as if she's saying "I don't love you." God has designed our hearts and minds to work differently. Eggerichs uses Scripture to help understand this. Really, really helpful.
Real Marriage by Mark & Grace Driscoll - I love this one because it focuses a lot on the importance of friendship. God has led them to minister in the grittiest part of peoples lives and marriages, and the wisdom they share from that is priceless.
It doesn't matter if your marriage is great, mediocre, or miserable...it can benefit from these books.
Couple of things first: The only person you can change is you. I know, that's terribly disappointing. It's way more fun to point out other people's shortcomings and then tell them how they should change them. What's also disappointing, is that you (and me) need to read books asking God to reveal to us the condition of our own hearts, and then ask for His help to take the hard, hard steps necessary for change.
I know not many wives have husbands who love to read. Especially these kinds of books. I think all four of these have study guides that you can get and work through together. It can be less intimidating that way and it definitely opens up some opportunities to discuss hard things that might not just "come-up" in conversation.
It is worth the effort. :)